Tuesday, February 03, 2009

rock racing, 5 questions & michael ball CHALLENGE

hi sean!

aren't you excited for the Tour of California?! I AM!

will i finally get to meet you? i hope so! i want to come to santa rosa to see my girlfriends all race the crit there. (i guess i will stick around for the men's "pro-tour" finish too). i will have all my girlfriends come to the RR tent-- but please note that all of them will be wearing their racing spandex or sweatpants, because NO ONE CAN FIND JEANS THAT FIT OUR MASSIVE QUADS!

so. some questions/propositions for you relating to the tour of cali:

  1. will i get to meet michael ball?
  2. will he bring me a free pair of jeans that fit me?
  3. or, because "2" isn't possible, will he measure me and make me my own special pair of keirin cuts for the future? (i can bring a tape measure)
  4. will you let me ride in the team car on saturday? please please please please please! i am excellent company and can do a bottle feed like no one's business. i am also an A+ heckler and will be sure to give some real encouragment to your riders. this will also offer me some time to sell my keirin cut idea.
  5. LASTLY-- i CHALLENGE michael ball to goldsprints! so, you might not have heard of this.... but these are these stationary roller racers for 500m or about 20 seconds. they are very fun and a total crazy atmosphere with lots of hipsters screaming in your face. they are doing them sunday in santa rosa -- and i would like nothing more than to take a few minutes of michael ball's time to roller race against him.
i would like to place a bet:
  • if I win, michael ball will make me a custom pair of KEIRIN CUT jeans.
  • if he wins, i will not sue him for copyright violation when he makes a fortune off of my idea.
regardless, this is an awesome PR opportunity. you can see the cycling news article now: "michael ball loses to big-quaded girl in roller race." (i say lose, because i like to talk shit.)
okay, sean, let me know! this could be lots of fun!!!




Anonymous said...

Beth, baby, you are on a "roll"
Ball will crush you, according to Bahati, he has a tremendous sprint.

Anonymous said...

Boy, as a big-quadded guy (or just a little plump, in my case), i could use the Keirin Cut jeans too!

CyclistRick said...

Beth, I hereby donate the extra material from my jeans, since I seem to need less this year, to your custom Keirin cut jeans.

And you should have linked to the pic of you heckling Hernando at Cats Hill in your plea to be in the team car.