here is a picture of me the first time i stepped into the ADT center last year:
we will call that the wimper of terror, as i walked up to turn 1/2 and stared straight down the bank and my pulse started beating like i was finished with a sprint.
after that stupid move, i learned the cardinal rule of going to steep tracks: don't walk to the top until you are done! i followed this rule at portland. (although i was still scared pretty shitless out there as well.) but after the weekend races were done, i walked to turn 3/4 and almost shat my pants looking at the angle going down and was quite amazed with how i actually rode my bike on it for the whole weekend. perhaps the lesson learned is: don't think about it, just do what you do.
well, this is all moot. the point is, when i went to blaine the other week, it was super easy and i think my anxiety of those steep tracks is significantly less. nevertheless, i thought this picture of terror would be funny to post right as i am about to leave for nationals. cause, while i may not feel that way about the track anymore, perhaps that is how i should feel about the whole experience.
but actually.... my terror level at the moment is probably green or blue. this i guess is good. to be honest i thought i'd defintiely be orange or red right about now. maybe i will rise in the next few days, as my racing starts thursday...but i don't really think i'll get above yellow. all in all, i've felt surprisingly un-overwhelmed about the whole thing. (knock on wood)
this moment is one where i am really happy i am unattached, because no one gives a shit about how i do. and as my sole unattached teammate michiko told me this weekend: "the only thing i care about is that you put your quad measurement on your blog every thursday!" (which i have been slacking on, but it was 63cm last thursday). so if that is the amount of outside pressure i get, i can certainly handle it.
this moment is also a time where it is especially nice being new and being my first time going to nationals... kind of just take it all in, do my best, and see what it is like. i have a couple small and modest personal goals for the week and am leaving it at that. getting good results (well, at least for someone like me), takes years and years of training, and is a very slow process. so i am just going to spin my midget gear heart out, and see what it is all like.
my schedule is as follows:
thursday- 500m, scratch qualifiers
friday- keirin, ?scratch finals?
saturday- 200m, sprints?
sunday- team sprint
i don't know if i will be able to post updates, cause i will not be brining a computer with me... but i bet fixedgear fever will be doing those live updates and i will be sure to write a funny debreif [i promise it will be funny, unlike this post] of the whole experience upon my return.... BEFORE my root canal!