Friday, October 29, 2010

keirin cut proposition

just a quick friday afternoon update!

last night i received an email back from the good folks at outlier.
Hi Beth, Much apologies, your email came as quite a shock to us, we certainly did not name our pants with the intention of robbing or offending anyone. We were not in anyway actively aware of your keirin cut campaign. However in digging through our old emails we did find someone sending us a link over 25 months ago to your site. It’s a great name and likely stuck with us while the source of it regrettably did not. We’ve added a link and acknowledgment to our site. If you’d like to chat further, please give us a call at our office and we’ll be happy to chat. Best regards and apologies for any confusion.
a very nice letter, indeed and thanks very much for the response and link on your website. of course i did not have the name trademarked, nor am i much for legal snafus with small, homegrown businesses.

i thought about it long and hard on my whole 15 minute commute home, and decided there is only one true course of action: the keirin cut dungarees must go to the test!!!

there is lots of skepticism about these pants because of this skinny model, who clearly does not belong in the big-quad club.

i mean. i don't even think he could squat the bar.

do these pants actually fit big-quaded keirin riders like they claim? i think they need to be put to the test.

i propose the following folks be testers:

#1 - dana feiss


u.s. national keirin champion. dana feiss has big quads. i still remember the day i first saw them one and a half years ago. i still shudder at the memory.

and thanks pat benson for the bitchin' photo!

here is dana walking to her start. do you see those quads?! i mean, she could crush that guy standing on the hood of the car. will these pants really fit her?


#2 - giovanni rey

no one has bigger quads than gio. no one. and even if they have a bigger measurement... proportionally speaking, no one has a bigger quad measurement. gio's quads are so big, he can really only ride a bike, as he must slightly waddle to walk because of the ginormous muscle he possesses.

i think this side shot really speaks for itself.

i mean, gio's quads are so big, he can't even wear normal clothes. only spandex. so if these dungarees can fit him, then i think i will definitely approve of the keirin cut name.

#3 steven beardsley

i mostly choose steven beardsley as tester number three... because, well, no one is really any damn funnier. i mean, he wears pink. he team is the gentle lovers. and, yeah, his quads are pretty damn big too.

and he's even done really well in some keirins even though he is an enduro.


#4 jennie reed


lastly, who better to be testing the truth of dungarees more than WORLD KEIRIN CHAMPION jennie reed?

yeah, jennie has turned enduro this year. but her quads are still huge. i know because i touched them in seattle this summer. and trust me, they were solid. it is rare you see quads that are just as big at the bottom part of the quad, than the top of the quad. that is what it takes to be world champion.

and world champions need pants!!!

what makes you think that world keirin champion will test your pants. well, she became my facebook friend. finally. so she does what my blog tells her to do.

so, mr. abe- are you game? will you undergo a testing of your pantalons with some real keirin riders? if they fit, i will be more than happy for you to use the name.

if they do not, i kindly ask you to change the name to some lame-sounding endurance event like: scratch style or olympic style omnium make, or madison leg....

and

secondly: make some jeans for women using my test models for sizing. that was the whole point of my campaign anyway!

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

try a pair on 5x world masters champion Dena Eaton, too: http://www.velodrome.org.uk/masters10d4.html

Sparkle said...

I just had to drop you a line as I stumbled across your blog last night and it completely cracked me up !!! You’ve touched Jennie Reed’s quads LOL !

I too am a trackie and have started the gym and was googling to see how much the women trackies are squatting and too see how big their thighs are (sounds dodgy eh?) – so I started off with ‘Victoria Pendleton’ and ‘squat’ moving on to ‘Jennie reed’ and ‘quads’ and that’s when I found your blog. I’ve been a huge fan of Jennie ever since she won her kieren title – I watched that live and thought it was awesome. I was laughing when I saw your pictures of different trackies quads and the pictures showing you and Jennie on the track together as that’s totally what I would do. Pretty awesome :-)

Anyway, I just wanted to say hello and I have very much enjoyed reading your blog. Keep up the good work.

galletamonster said...

Screw niceties! My brother can represent you in court.

laura said...

I'm not worthy - but I could use something in the range of a "criterium cut"... my wife wants me to switch to another sport that doesn't create freakish proportions so my jeans will fit better. I keep insisting, I just need the right cut!!

HELP!!!

laura said...

oops - was signed in as that darn wife... it's really me, RacerX

Dr. X said...

And right - that model couldn't spin the granny gear on the EB crit course, why not hire Randall or Sterling.... some actual quads with model quality looks?

RacerX, on a rant!

Anonymous said...

yo Beth! I cant believe they took your awesome idea- and then to put em on skinny leg people!! so not worthy!!! you have done all the leg work- chasing down Michael Ball for ages..you totally rock- keep em spinning

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