"so, uh, why do you want me to do tuesday instead of wednesday?""i think you will get more pack riding experience...etc, etc. what races are on wednesday, anyway?""chariot, scratch, win n out, miss n out""yeah, i think tuesday will be better for you""...........uhhhh, o....kay"
normally, i wouldn't really care. but let's be honest, the real reason i was giving the change in schedule a second thought was because our yearly NACHO POTLUCK was occurring at work on tuesday--and the thought of gorging on nachos and then doing two 40-lap points races didn't sound all that appealing.
but, i obeyed orders.
plus, i like a challenge. and nachos for lunch would be a new challenge. so while i was originally bummed, in fact, i started getting a little bit excited about it-- after i thought about it more.
you see, when i was a track & field runner in college-- one season i decided to do cross country, "for training." now, why i thought this was a good idea is beyond me, considering i was a 400m runner, cross country only kills your fast twitch... but i thought it'd be fun to be a 3-season athlete, and i always liked the distance runners, and they always seemed to have much more fun going on long runs, compared to doing hell interval repeats in circles every single day. so i ran my ass off that summer, doing something stupid like 12 miles sunday runs...and then was still the slowest person on the JV team (except during "speed work" day).
anyway, i was like the amazon woman on the cross country team. those girls were tiny. probably because about fifty percent of the team was "vegan with a gluten allergy" -- and, i'm guessing that isn't just cause i went to some hippy school on the east coast.... so when i'd see a few teammates at lunch time, some just ate baby carrots or celery of something like that, cause, ya know, don't want to mess up your stomach for a workout FOUR hours later. so, before interval day, i used to make a point of eating in the locker room just before we'd go warmup. at first it was a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, then i'd up my anti each week-- ice cream bar, pie, it didn't really matter. i got adventurous!
the first few weeks, intervals were a little extra unpleasant. but i was surprised at how after a few weeks of such diligent training, nothing -- i mean nothing -- phased me. a couple teammates thought it was disgusting, but mostly it became a joke and a challenge. still, i am a firm believer that you can train your stomach to digest anything before exercise, it just takes persistence and consistent training, like anything.
but i never tried nachos.
granted, i had many hours of digestion before racing starting. but the combo of the chips, fake cheese, refried beans, sour cream, salsa, guacamole, and non-alcoholic margaritas seemed intriguing, to say the least. so i didn't hold back at the nacho potluck. and you know what? i didn't even notice during the race. so i won.
well, actually, i didn't win. (by winning above, i mean i beat the nachos...not actually, anyone in the race.) i think i scored a whopping ONE point all evening.
except for the five points i scored in my own imaginary world. so when the pace slowed down going into 'bell lap'- i popped it out of turn four, and to my surprise i am sprinting really hard down the back stretch and no one is coming around me.... so i just ramp it up even more around the turn, and i come out of turn four totally gassed--- but i really wanted to win that sprint, so i put in an extra little effort and no one is coming around... but i kinda hear something in my delusional sprinting state-- and i look up at the lap cards and it says "6" -- and yes, indeed, larry was ringing the bell....
what a dumb shit -- sprinting a lap early. well, i was totally gassed at that point, as i poured everything into my sprint... so when the actual sprint started, i could do nothing but get dusted and dropped with 5 laps to go, like a big nitwit. so, all i can say about the whole evening is:
a) i got one point, andb) the nachos didn't make me puke
so i suppose i can call it a successful evening.
oh yeah, i forgot the best part of the night. simmons comes up to me and asks me if i know when we are getting our new team kits. i say i don't know, but i hope soon, cause i look like a club rider in this jersey. (i am wearing john's old jersey, which, is a bit baggy on me to the least) then simmons looks at me and says, yeah that is huge! you need to get a boob job. i inquire if this is covered under team sponsorship.